Author Archives: Drayton

The sheer blithering incompetence of Barclays Bank

The man in charge of this utterly incompetent cock-up of a business gets paid up to £8,240,000 a year ‘The older I get the more I admire and crave competence, just simple competence, in any field from adultery to zoology,’ said H. L. … Continue reading

News from the clueless

Does this kind of witless rubbish irritate you as much as me? No wonder surveys reveal top management thinks marketers are clueless On September 8th someone called Irene Labai wrote to me. She is a “Success Manager” at a firm called EasyERP. … Continue reading

When the blind lead the blind, where do you end up?

One reason why your copy may fail is simple. You didn’t pay enough. That’s not because you’re stupid. Why pay more than you need for anything? And there are two seemingly logical reasons why people don’t pay enough for copy … Continue reading

Costly, Catastrophic, Mistake I See Every Day

Sometimes I feel like a broken record: saying the same old things, over and over. But you know, I only say them because they are important and worth saying. Take this for example. Many people have never even thought about … Continue reading

The Triumph of Drivel: An Antipodean View

Don’t know I missed this hilarious comment on the kind of tripe that’s being purveyed by marketers My friend Ryan Wallman of Melbourne has come out with another cracker.  It reminded me of Hemingway’s remark: “The most essential gift for … Continue reading

Over £18 million: the reward for failure. Nice work if you can get it – but you can’t

Year after year Marks and Spencer fails. Their ads give you a clue. Their marketers haven’t got one. Why? 60 odd years ago I applied for a trainee’s  job at Mark & Spencer – at that time and for long … Continue reading

Cheese-paring insanity at the Marriott

How not to run a rewards scheme (or a hotel) Recently I stayed at a Marriott hotel. I quite looked forward to it. They are a premium group, so I expected something a little special. What I got was something … Continue reading

Why Theo felt aghast – the answer to a great conundrum

A copywriter asks why so much copy doesn’t even try to sell: here is the answer Theo has been working in a job where he has to get sales. As he was pretty good at it, he thought he’d try … Continue reading

Congratulations to an idiot at the helm of an important business YOU are engaged in

You may not realise it, but this affects you – and it really upset a friend of mine I don’t suppose you spend much time thinking about it, but everything that goes on in the world’s most pervasive and perhaps … Continue reading

The Curse of the New and the Triumph of Ignorance.

Which marketing weapons do you use? And why? The other day I went to SpecSavers to get new glasses. Outside the shop was a man giving out leaflets. They have someone there every day. They also send me regular letters … Continue reading