Countries get the rulers they deserve.

Between them the great Bliar and the Bloated Haggis managed something extraordinary.

In the eleven years since they took over, besides transforming a massive financial surplus into our greatest burden of debt since the end of the second world war (twice as big as that of any other European country but concealed by financial chicanery) they managed to spew over 3,600 laws. Almost one every day.

This achievement is all the more impressive as at the same time the only laws any of us give a damn about – the ones aimed to deter thieves, catch murderers and so on – are being flouted as never before.

Up and down the country the guardians of justice have set about discouraging Carol Services, protecting terrorists, hounding market stall holders, fining motorists and taking care of all those other things dear to the politically correct and scorned by the sensible.

At the same time countless new bodies have been set up – like one of the Haggis’s most brilliant “initiatives” – the ludicrously incompetent Financial Service Authority. This priceless exemplar of bureaucratic buffoonery, which totally failed to predict or prevent the financial catastrophe we will all be paying for indefinitely (except me because I’ll be dead long before the bill is settled) has reported that its fees could rise by almost £100m to around £400m in 2009 as it “improves supervision of banks”.

Very droll. They couldn’t supervise a piss-up in a brewery. In fact the total bill for supervising the financial services industry will almost triple to £900m next year. And this is just one of the countless similar bodies set up to supervise all manner of things badly and provide jobs (with pensions) for parasites.

And what does the British Public think about this sort of performance? They think Gordon Brown is a good man to steer us through troubled times.

The man who left “New” Labour such a massive financial surplus to piss away on failing to achieve anything except debt, worse education, more crime, and a couple of unwinnable wars was that old fool John Major.

Remember him? To me he looks like a genius by comparison. Not known for his wit, he commented on Brown’s current popularity rather aptly a few days ago, more or less as follows:

“You don’t hire the man who just burgled you to come back and fix your alarm system.”

Oh, but you do if you’re the British voter.

God help us all. Another eleven years and we’ll be worse off than Romania. (Where incidentally I met a lot of pretty smart, educated people earlier this year. Here I see that half the kids can’t read and write.)

The last country that achieved what this lot have managed was Argentina in the ’40s. Juan Peron took the fourth richest country in the world and beggared it. His creed was fascism. Gordon Brown’s creed is Get Gordon Brown elected. That will do just as well.

Which begs the question, what is Cameron’s creed? Get Cameron elected.

Enough spleen for today. Happy Christmas everyone.

About the Author

In 2003, the Chartered Institute of Marketing named Drayton one of 50 living individuals who have shaped today’s marketing.

He has worked in 55 countries with many of the world’s greatest brands. These include American Express, Audi, Bentley, British Airways, Cisco, Columbia Business School, Deutsche Post, Ford, IBM, McKinsey, Mercedes, Microsoft, Nestle, Philips, Procter & Gamble, Toyota, Unilever, Visa and Volkswagen.

Drayton has helped sell everything from Airbus planes to Peppa Pig. His book, Commonsense Direct and Digital Marketing, out in 17 languages, has been the UK’s best seller on the subject every year since 1982. He has also run his own businesses in the U.K., Portugal and Malaysia.

He was a main board member of the Ogilvy Group, a founding member of the Superbrands Organisation, one of the first eight Honorary Fellows of the Institute of Direct Marketing and one of the first three people named to the Hall of Fame of the Direct Marketing Association of India. He has also been given Lifetime Achievement Awards by the Caples Organisation in New York and Early To Rise in Florida.

2 Comments

  1. old wisdom says: the features of the product do not matter, the marketing does. John Major had the poorer marketers.

  2. Maciej Mardyllo

    Mr Bird!
    All the best for Christmas.
    Let the 2009 will be full of positive happens.

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