Measured reaction to economic crisis

I see that Ministers are not being panicked by the economic crisis, because for them there isn’t one.

Porqui “My old man’s a wanker” Smith billed taxpayers £40 for a barbecue in her second home – no doubt on the grounds that “every little helps”. Imagine what would happen if the Inland Revenue caught you or me doing this.

Mind you she says she is “just about 100% sure” she did not claim for it. What would that be then, dearie? 93% sure? 77% sure? Not sure at all because you’re chronically dishonest? Isn’t that the second home you’re ripping us off for in the first place? Does your “parliamentary aid” get boxes of tissues on expenses? Are you sure? How sure?

Anyhow, there are more important things for the good and great to focus on than the Home Secretary being dishonest or the country going down the pan. The other day I was relieved to see that the Almighty Bloat has warned the North Koreans to mend their ways. Has this reduced the rogues to shuddering fear, with The Beloved Leader fleeing to the hills in panic? Or did they just say, “Who gives a shit?” at the thought of being threatened by the Western world’s worst economic manager? Maybe they just said, “Gordon Who? Oh, that pompous fool.”

At home I read that many menus are to incorporate calorie counts: a wise strategic move that should kick-start the economy. The last place I saw anything like that on a menu was in Krakow – on an old menu left over from the communist era. But then surely you have noticed that in everything it does this government has emulated the Stalinist approach, right down to driving the country into bankruptcy.