A desperate plea for help: IT masochist needed

Wanted for nightmare part-time job: a pointy-head as good as Anthony

Do you understand – really understand – the dark mysteries of the internet?

Can you imagine what it’s like to work for someone who doesn’t have the vaguest idea – yet expects you to rescue him and his colleagues from all manner of tragedies, cock-ups and last minute panics?

Can you imagine this loopy old fool would have the nerve to contact you at crazy hours and expect you to work your magic?

And that he and his colleagues may contact you at weekends – because they often work then too?

And can you believe these horrors are not even that well paid?

Anthony has put up with all that – and more.

He was only 22 when he began. Now after three years he looks a rather tired 85.

He’s saved us from countless disasters.

He’s very polite, amazingly quick, slightly mad and very forgiving – because he says he’s enjoyed the ride.

I have no idea what he’s been doing or how hard it is, but he says “the hours are unpredictable, but the work isn’t especially taxing – just time consuming sometimes”.

This is only true if you can do all this – very well and very quickly.

– Set up, manage, and tinker with WordPress sites

– Help with products we sell through PayPal using custom buttons, subscription payments etc.

– Proof read emails we send out every day

– Send broadcast emails and set up auto-responders using services like Aweber and iContact

– Manage orders in Clickbank

– Convert videos from one format to another, so they’re OK for playing on the web

– Upload and manage files on Amazon S3

– Be comfortable with FTP, website hosting, cPanel and making small changes to databases using PHPMyAdmin

– Know enough HTML and CSS to set up stand-alone landing pages

– Occasionally find a Javascript or PHP snippet and make it work on a landing page.

– Also very occasional minor video editing.

– Plus a thing called Fast Member that none of us have a clue about except him

– And be able to write decent English

– All this takes the marvellous Anthony 15 hours a week

What’s the upside?

Well, the business is quite interesting.

You never have to come to the office – we don’t have a proper one. In fact you can do this from anywhere.

I don’t give a hoot what age you are – or anything else except whether you can do all the above and are literate.

We’re among the best in the world at what we do.

And if you want to succeed in marketing – well, this is a pretty good place to learn.

Many people who started with me have gone on to become remarkably successful all over the world.

I always listen to suggestions and promote talent.

You may find us good fun.

So if what you’ve read interests you, email kelly@draytonbird.com.

Do it now, as we tend to get a lot of replies when we advertise jobs.

About the Author

In 2003, the Chartered Institute of Marketing named Drayton one of 50 living individuals who have shaped today’s marketing.

He has worked in 55 countries with many of the world’s greatest brands. These include American Express, Audi, Bentley, British Airways, Cisco, Columbia Business School, Deutsche Post, Ford, IBM, McKinsey, Mercedes, Microsoft, Nestle, Philips, Procter & Gamble, Toyota, Unilever, Visa and Volkswagen.

Drayton has helped sell everything from Airbus planes to Peppa Pig. His book, Commonsense Direct and Digital Marketing, out in 17 languages, has been the UK’s best seller on the subject every year since 1982. He has also run his own businesses in the U.K., Portugal and Malaysia.

He was a main board member of the Ogilvy Group, a founding member of the Superbrands Organisation, one of the first eight Honorary Fellows of the Institute of Direct Marketing and one of the first three people named to the Hall of Fame of the Direct Marketing Association of India. He has also been given Lifetime Achievement Awards by the Caples Organisation in New York and Early To Rise in Florida.

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