When I first started writing copy nobody – as I noted a few days ago – had the vaguest idea what I did and trying to explain to someone normal like Tommy Cochrane, the barman at my parents’ pub, that …
Read MoreCategory: Uncategorized
My big fat gorgeous Greek rip-off: Amnesia rules at AOL … and Arianna laughs all the way to the bank
Many years ago there was a highly articulate, pretty little blue-stocking at Cambridge called Arianna Stassinopoulos who went on to appear on TV and lived with one of Britain’s best and funniest journalists, Bernard Levin. They parted and off she …
Read MoreGeorge Bernard Shaw was funny – but not always right – and news about the Great Mystery Branding Event
Over 40 years ago my first book was published. I sent it to Bill Melton, one of my old teachers at Trent College, with thanks for his help in shaping me. Modestly he quoted George Bernard Shaw: “Those who can …
Read More“Don’t tell my mother I’m in advertising – she thinks I play the piano in a brothel”
I think that title, from Jacques Seguela, is the most entertaining of any book about advertising, closely followed by Jerry Della Femina’s “From those wonderful folks who gave you Pearl Harbor”. But when I inveigled my way into the ad …
Read More“It’s the same the whole world over – ain’t it all a bleeding shame”
This wonderful old song line came to mind when I read a story in Malaysia’s Advertising and Marketing magazine about a pitch for the Tourism Malaysia account. The mag – which is excellent, by the way – comments that “Half …
Read MoreAntediluvian antics at Barclays Bank. Stumbling across a good idea they make their staff’s jobs impossible. What else is new?
How can one single out a particular bank in for incompetence, rapacity and all round folly? It is hard; but I have always had a soft spot for Barclays. They had a series of loopy marketing directors, all of whom …
Read MoreNeither Spick Nor Span – Just rather sloppy like my spelling, but more infuriating
I’m sorry, but this is all going to be rather tedious, so let’s start with one of my favourites: “We can always bear with equanimity the misfortunes of our friends” – De la Rochefoucauld. Since it takes weeks to get …
Read MoreMy night with Sir Les Patterson – and my other most embarassing moment
If you don’t know who this great man is, well, what a cultural experience you’ve missed. He has been described as obese, lecherous and offensive, which goes to show that in the world of politics John Prescott has competition. But …
Read MoreStudents leader talks bollocks – as usual – plus a new free video coming up
Since 1975 every President of the National Union of Students has gone on to become a politician, almost invariably in the Labour Party. The best (or worst) example is Jack Straw who went on to become one of The Great …
Read MoreYour bloody nightmare, as promised, Sir! Plus my Shit List
Well. moving home has lived down to its billing. The majestic new couch wouldn’t go through the door at the new place so we had to put it in storage; the cleaners hadn’t cleaned properly; the man who brought the …
Read More