My father never tired of telling me how he and my mother had “scrimped and saved” to send me to good schools. I ran away from the first and hated the second. But I would like to thank the ghost …
Read MoreAuthor: Gerald Woodgate
The state we’re in – which is unlikely to improve
It’s 5 am-ish here in Chelsea and I hear outside the usual drunken oafs lurching their way home – as I do any morning around this time. When the Great Bliar came in to wreak his magic 14 years ago …
Read MoreThe triumph of the Know Nothings – same old, same old
Here’s a coincidence. Seth Godin wrote the other day: “Many people in the United States purchase one or fewer books every year. Many of those people have seen every single episode of American Idol. There is clearly a correlation here.” …
Read MoreWhose country is it anyway? How the British are giving up – and other thoughts
A lady running a cafe in Stockport has been told by council fuckwits to stop serving bacon because it might cause offence to Muslims next door. It is “unacceptable on the grounds of residential amenity”. I cannot say that Stockport …
Read MoreAt last! Crap creative makes its entrance, a good joke from Slovenia – and a quick preview for you
My colleague Carol, who has put up with me for over a decade now, has an eagle eye for the ludicrous. So I must thank her for showing me this example of how not to advertise. As so often the …
Read More“You there in the back row, pay attention. You are at the magic crossroads”.
I just got an email from not one, but two of my old clients, making a big mistake. It read: Tell Us What You Think At American Express, we want to know what you think of our service – and …
Read MoreMy second Lucky Owl at David Ogilvy’s Chateau
I apologise for the quality of the pictures: they were taken with my mobile phone, an antique by today’s standards – four years old. I keep asking my colleagues for a new one with all the trimmings, but they refuse …
Read MoreWhy monkeys are smarter than people
My friend Ian Ramsden is a very able direct marketer who lives in Colombo, Sri Lanka. I was hoping to visit him last year to entertain the locals with voice and gesture, but they have even less money to spend …
Read More“My father called it art. I call it child abuse.”
Yesterday I saw an article about an avant garde Scandinavian artist who has “created” what I suppose they call an installation consisting of all the furniture of her apartment. How much talent did that take? How much thought? Have a …
Read MoreDoes the Internet make idiots of us all? My answer is a resounding “I need no help in that department”
Here’s a good insult for you. My great favourite Dr. Johnson said unkindly of the playwright Sheridan (who was actually brilliant) : “Why, Sir, Sherry is dull, naturally dull. But it must have taken a deal of effort to become …
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