Blog

What’s holding me up?

Who are these two young stalwarts, holding up the tottering edifice that is Bird? They are Ben Jesson and Dr. Karl Blanks, partners in www.conversion-rate-experts.com. They are the only Authorised Google Optimiser Consultants in Britain, which sounds rather grand but …

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The world’s local wank

Marketers often place the horse firmly before the cart. If you really think that spending millions on papering the world with fanciful tosh about your “brand” helps, it’s not a bad idea to make sure that the reality approximates, however …

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This will bring tears to your eyes

John Walter was quite right to scold me yesterday — and I shall talk about this again. In the meantime, something entirely different, sent by my friend George in San Francisco.

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Whatever happened to The Spectator?

A couple of weeks ago I picked up my copy of The Spectator, a respected journal which has been around in one form or another since the early 1700’s. Its founders, Joseph Addison and Richard Steele, were two of the …

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Stupid – or what?

This is a very obviously posed picture of a rather unsuccessful bank robber called Willie Sutton being arrested in New York about 70 years ago. Shifty looking bugger, isn’t he? Today he’d probably be a retired investment advisor. I often …

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New Year Buffoonery

While the rest of you were no doubt making pious New Year resolutions, I was out doing what I do best: making a fool of myself. (In case you’re wondering, the picture being so blurred, I’m the one on the …

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The Heaviest Element Known to Science

Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 …

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Countries get the rulers they deserve.

Between them the great Bliar and the Bloated Haggis managed something extraordinary. In the eleven years since they took over, besides transforming a massive financial surplus into our greatest burden of debt since the end of the second world war …

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