A driver is stuck in a traffic jam going into Central London. Nothing is moving north or south. Suddenly a man knocks on his window. The driver rolls t idown his window and asks, ‘What’s happened, what’s the hold up?’ …
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“Now just high-tail it on out of here, you pesky critter” said the Mail Marshal at Seiko Watches
One of my readers who works at Seiko often fails to get his normal helping of perceptive social comment from me because the Mail Marshal there stops it dead. Something about unacceptable language, apparently. Amazing. So I thought I might …
Read MoreWine-lovers’ cartoon found in “The Oldie”
‘The difference? Well Sir, the Barolo is ripe, rich and round, with lots of spicy, earth-scented black cherry and berry flavors, hinting deliciously at chocolate on the smooth finish, while The Blue Nun is more nylon underpants, skid-marks, ITV, thick …
Read MoreWhy we are all fed up with the idiots in charge
Here is a quote from Rod Liddle, the leading bottle-thrower in The Spectator. “A charity called Help for Heroes, which raises money for wounded British soldiers, asked Portsmouth City Council for a £500 donation towards a proposed ‘fun day’. The …
Read MoreFor male chauvinists and mathematicians only
I finished six pieces of copy yesterday and I’m fed up with sectarian squabbles, so time for a laugh.My friend Andy Owen just sent me a joke about these two ladies, which I have seen before, but it still made …
Read MoreNow, now, calm down you two
I see that my last two posts have started the internet version of a pub brawl. And I think I should say that the Mike in question is not my son-in-law, in case anyone thinks so. I have some sympathy …
Read MoreYou can always rely on Mike
My son-in-law Mike despite pretending to run a hotel outside Manchester only has one real interest in life: making dreadful jokes. He has not let me down: I got a message yesterday morning congratulating me on my Sunni disposition. Nice …
Read MoreOn jokes and such
My friend Rezbi got a bit excited about the last post, and my response is this. I like the joke. I also like Irish jokes, Jewish jokes, Polish jokes, English jokes, Scottish jokes (except for a few in Parliament), Australian …
Read MoreEngish Weather explained
A friend sent me this, and I just couldn’t resist it.In deference to The Archbishop of Canterbury and The Royal Commission for Political Correctness, it was announced today that the local climate should no longer be referred to as ‘English …
Read MoreGuess who has the most fun – and pays the price?
I don’t know whether I’ve said this before, but when I used to bang out six marketing columns a month someone asked me how I managed it. I said all I had to do was open any marketing publication anywhere …
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