The unexpected joys of Spam … now that’s what I call a pair of kneecaps

I think I mentioned the other day that Steve, who arranges these matters for me, has reset our thing-a-me-bob machine to allow a deluge of spam to come flooding in. This makes life pretty tedious, but there are small compensations in some of the messages.

Now I have to confess having spent many a day, night, week, month and year in dedicated search and reverie related to bizarre sexual frolics of one kind another.

For the most part my time was wasted, which is probably just as well. All the same,I believe I have developed as vivid an imagination as anyone about the esoteric side of these matters. Nevertheless, nothing in my wildest dreams can cope with the picture conjured up by something that came whizzing my way an hour or so ago.

Its subject line read “Ebony Girl With Big Booty On Her Knees”. How the hell can the poor girl walk without falling over? And if you wanted to get friendly with her, where exactly would you find the right opening?

It really makes me wish I had paid more attention in my anatomy lessons all those years ago.

About the Author

In 2003, the Chartered Institute of Marketing named Drayton one of 50 living individuals who have shaped today’s marketing.

He has worked in 55 countries with many of the world’s greatest brands. These include American Express, Audi, Bentley, British Airways, Cisco, Columbia Business School, Deutsche Post, Ford, IBM, McKinsey, Mercedes, Microsoft, Nestle, Philips, Procter & Gamble, Toyota, Unilever, Visa and Volkswagen.

Drayton has helped sell everything from Airbus planes to Peppa Pig. His book, Commonsense Direct and Digital Marketing, out in 17 languages, has been the UK’s best seller on the subject every year since 1982. He has also run his own businesses in the U.K., Portugal and Malaysia.

He was a main board member of the Ogilvy Group, a founding member of the Superbrands Organisation, one of the first eight Honorary Fellows of the Institute of Direct Marketing and one of the first three people named to the Hall of Fame of the Direct Marketing Association of India. He has also been given Lifetime Achievement Awards by the Caples Organisation in New York and Early To Rise in Florida.

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