How I got eaten by alligators – a true story, with a penis thrown in

Nearly twenty years ago I did a couple of talks at American Express in New York. In fact if I crane my neck I can see the video tapes of one of them from my desk in our sordid basement.

Anyhow my jokes went down well enough for them to ask me to create a training programme for their senior people. This I did with rave reviews – after the first day 100% of the delegates said they would recommend it to their colleagues. So I went on whizzing around the world for them until some politically correct twerp complained about my language, and the whole adventure ended.

My clients there were three wonderful ladies, and eventually I heard from one of them about five years ago. She was writing a book, and could she use my name for the main villain?

Thus it was that I appeared in The Ivy Chronicles, by Karen Quinn. In it I meet a nasty end, being eaten by alligators, which to be honest may not entirely explain why it became a best seller – the first of several she has written. Last time I heard it was being made into a film. Fame at last?

Karen is extremely funny as you’ll see if you go to http://karenquinn.net/category/blog.

I don’t know anyone else who would have an entry headed “Meet me under the Penis at the Time Warner Center.”

What an admirable woman!

About the Author

In 2003, the Chartered Institute of Marketing named Drayton one of 50 living individuals who have shaped today’s marketing.

He has worked in 55 countries with many of the world’s greatest brands. These include American Express, Audi, Bentley, British Airways, Cisco, Columbia Business School, Deutsche Post, Ford, IBM, McKinsey, Mercedes, Microsoft, Nestle, Philips, Procter & Gamble, Toyota, Unilever, Visa and Volkswagen.

Drayton has helped sell everything from Airbus planes to Peppa Pig. His book, Commonsense Direct and Digital Marketing, out in 17 languages, has been the UK’s best seller on the subject every year since 1982. He has also run his own businesses in the U.K., Portugal and Malaysia.

He was a main board member of the Ogilvy Group, a founding member of the Superbrands Organisation, one of the first eight Honorary Fellows of the Institute of Direct Marketing and one of the first three people named to the Hall of Fame of the Direct Marketing Association of India. He has also been given Lifetime Achievement Awards by the Caples Organisation in New York and Early To Rise in Florida.

5 Comments

  1. DaveC

    OT: Thank you for recommending And Then We Came to the End. In places as dark as it is funny in others, I enjoyed it.

    Curious of your opinion on the first page of chapter 5: “The less fortunate or talented among us went to direct-mail shops or turned to the temp agencies for uninsured day jobs.”

  2. This book is right on the money, Dave. Ad people always thought (and still do) that direct would be a piece of piss. The ones I hired were almost all useless – including a very good writer of some famous ads who wrote a really excellent copywriting textbook. The problem was few could construct and deliver a full argument or write long copy; they were used to dramatising one aspect of the product or service. I always found ordinary advertising relatively easy. Only one person to please: the client.

  3. drayblog@spoharax.com

    Thank You, Drayton. You've reminded me.

    THBW was always an Adventure: sometimes absurd, I remember the Barbie Friends' Club, sometimes ground-breaking like TSB “The Bank that Likes to Say Yes” and lots of Accounts, won and lost, in-between.

    Those were the kinds of days and times we, who served and contributed to the reputation, shall remember with

    Kind regards

    Shannon O'Hara

  4. Awwwww! Thanks Drayton. You made my day. Next time you're in Miami, let's have drinks next to the butt at Delano Hotel.

  5. Awwwww! Thanks Drayton. You made my day. Next time you're in Miami, let's have drinks next to the butt at Delano Hotel.

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