(They couldn’t find any takers for me. I’m in the damaged goods basement)
A store that sells new husbands has opened.
The instructions at the entrance explain how the store operates:
You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increases as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a floor, or go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building.
So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor a sign reads:
Floor 1 – These men have jobs
She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 2 – These men have jobs and love kids.
‘That’s nice,’ she thinks, ‘but I want more.’
So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 – These men have jobs, love kids, and are extremely good looking.
‘Wow,’ she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 4 – These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead gorgeous and help with housework…
‘Oh, mercy me!’ she exclaims, ‘I can hardly stand it!’
Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 5 – These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead gorgeous, help with housework and have a strong romantic streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 6 – You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.
PLEASE NOTE:
To avoid gender bias charges, the store’s owner has opened a New Wives store just across the street with the same rules.
The first floor has wives that love sex.
The second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer
The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited
Shakespeare said it best: “women, what do they want????” I am a woman and I don’t even know. Thanks for the laugh of the day!