On Friday one of the gossip-riddled rags that purports to be a newspaper in London ran a story complaining bitterly about a poster campaign for Eurostar. They think it represents English football fans in the wrong light. You can see …
Read MoreAuthor: Drayton
Drayton, you idiot! It’s Michael, not Tony
I was lying in bed last night wondering what is my worst quality. This works much better than counting sheep as there is a limitless catalogue to select from. Anyhow, in business I decided it is a close run between …
Read MoreA thought for O’Leary
Last week my partner and I went to Brussels for a meeting. Not wishing to remortgage the flat so as to pay to go by Eurostar or go on a posh airline, we went on Ryanair. If you don’t live …
Read MoreHealth and safety warning
When you get to my age you have to keep a close eye on your health. I think I go to no end of trouble – breathe on a mirror every morning to see if I’m still alive and so …
Read MoreAh! This explains it: mutant ninja chimps are in charge
I am too damn cheap to buy the papers, which is a waste of time anyhow – yesterday the Sun’s front page said CHELSY QUITS BRITAIN. If you are a normal person you may not give a toss who Chelsy …
Read MoreThis week’s great read
What a wonderful day! My business worries are over. Someone has e-mailed me about a book that “provides readers with proven business intelligence from C-Level executives (Chairman, CEO, CFO, CMO, Partner) from the world’s most respected companies nationwide.” I like …
Read MoreDo I look as though I’m 17?
I have clearly discovered the secret of eternal life. Last Saturday an idiot in the Kings Road Tesco, where I went to buy some cooking plonk, greeted me at the check out with this astounding request: “Can I have proof …
Read MoreIn awe of this stupidity
Anyone out there who can tell me how this makes anything even vaguely resembling sense? My colleagues and I are organising a conference in Brussels (which means they’re actually organising it and I’m asking irrelevant questions). Anyhow, my PA Iane …
Read More“Fings ain’t what they used to be”
That was a very popular show back in the ‘60’s. It struck a chord partly because we all moan about things going downhill. For instance, for hundreds – no, thousands – of years, people used to get married then have …
Read MoreA pig’s point of view
The first proper money I ever made was in my parents’ restaurant at the Sycamore Inn in Ashton-under-Lyne – a good 18th century pub of character which has since been utterly ruined by the tasteless halfwits at the brewery which …
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