Ever wondered just how very, very clever you are?

Me too.

And now I know, because last Sunday, just before I set out on a quick whiz to dio soine talks in Slovenia and the Czech Republic, my partner and her sister decided to subject me to an intelligence test.

It was one of those online things where you have a certain number of seconds to answer questions involving multiple choice. The sort of thing ten year olds (and Italian women, it seems) do in their sleep.

I took it and it did no good to my self-confidence at all. It turns out that I am about as stupid as you can get. I have the intelligence of a cat.

I suspect that is abiout as thick as you can be – though maybe they have lower categories for goldfish or centipedes.

My partner, conversely, got just about the highest marks you can get. She is as intelligent as a space man, apparently.

All this goes to show that I have been right all these years in claiming that my secret weapon as a marketer is innate stupidity.

Not even the most moronic customer is thicker than me. I really understand them, believe me.

Next Sunday I’m off again to Slovenia and Croatia.

You may reasonably ask why I am going back to the same country – Slovenia – again almost immediately. Well, what can you expect from a stupid sod like me?