One simple thing you can do now that will transform your business – I guarantee it

25 years ago David Ogilvy sent me the notes for a speech he was to make at a direct marketers’ convention, asking for my comments.

I had none, but the speech has stuck in my mind ever since. (And I learned a lesson: no matter how good you think you are, always get people to comment on your stuff).

In the speech he pointed out that we lived in two different worlds. One was the world of the general advertisers, who had no idea what results they were getting. The other was our world. “You know. You know your results to a penny,” he said.

He urged direct marketers to go out and educate the general advertisers. “Why don’t you save them from their folly?” he thundered.

This was somewhat optimistic, as general advertisers saw us as oily rags beneath their notice who sent out shit on paper.

Nothing much has changed – even today most corporate websites are rubbish because few of the people who commission or sign them off realise that everything on the internet is direct marketing.

But before making an incredibly naive suggestion that might help I would like to say that in a larger sense we live in two parallel worlds today. That of politicians and big corporations and ours, where we have to sell – or else.

The mindless ignorance of politicians was highlighted by Bill Bonner in the Daily Reckoning the other day.

The Euro-buffoons sent a man to Beijing to see if the Chinese would help with their financial shortfalls. No dice. They said “China can neither take up the role as a saviour to the Europeans, nor provide a ‘cure’ for the European malaise. Obviously, it is up to European countries themselves to tackle their financial problems.”

Then the man went to see the Japanese. This caused Mr. Bonner great mirth. “Asking Japan for a loan is like asking a starving man for a piece of chocolate cake. Japan already has more government debt than anyone. Its public debt- to-GDP ratio is up to 230%,” said he.

The truth is that after they have finished smiling for the cameras while doing nothing very much Messrs. Sarkozy, Merkel, Cameron and so on will retire gratefully to the great trough filled to overflowing for them by their pals and supplemented by their gold-plated pensions. The same applies to the union leaders, bankers and so on. They don’t share our worries.

At the start of my career I lived in a little two up and two down house in Ashton-under-Lyne. I was better off than my neighbours for two reasons. First, although our toilet was outside like theirs we were the only house in the row with a bath. Second, my parents gave me a good education.

Even then I was infinitely better off than the billions of people in the world today who have neither bathrooms nor toilets nor luxuries of any kind and are fighting to get into our pampered domains.

The salaries of the fat cats who run big corporations have soared as their workers’ have dropped in real terms. This is because they are determined by other fat cats who sit on their compensation, or rip-off committees. They are no more interested in results than when David made his speech. They still think advertising is all about fatuous slogans and wind-baggery – and their advertising agents know no better.

When I flew in on Tuesday Heathrow airport had posters for DHL all over the place. They read, “Where there’s room for improvement we’ll find it.” Then they modestly stated “EXCELLENCE. SIMPLY DELIVERED. AXA/PPP Healthcare say “PERFECTION/REDEFINED”. Please note the creative use of the . and the /. To you they may be a mere slash or a full stop. But this is award-winning stuff, friends, agonised over in many a long, cash-burning meeting.

You may never have to move to a house with an outside toilet, but unless you too have cash to burn you’d better get a lot better at what you do than these people. To give you an idea, here is the ending to some copy that ran when times were much harder than now.

Let nothing, absolutely nothing interfere with immediate action. A change for the better justifies no delay. Don’t watch others make money which you could make. Be up and doing now. Tomorrow may be too late. Place your order and application this very minute. Take the action now that means more money next week, independence next year.

If all you ever do is look at everything you run in the next year and ask if it has that burning desire to get people to act your results will soar. I guarantee it.

You may be relieved to see that I have not suggested that if you want to do better you come to www.EADIM.com next October. I will leave you to draw that conclusion without me banging you over the head.