New Daily Deals Post
If you came here after seeing my email, you may recall that I promised to analyse some copy I called the business equivalent of AIDS.
But if you just read this stuff for a laugh, well, that’s what I’m going to do, but I hope you get the odd chuckle out of it.
Only the most demented, lost souls deliberately infect themselves with a killer disease, but this is a fair analogy with this copy.
I am not just discussing the copy, though.
I shall also cover the meaning of those two much abused words, strategy and tactics.
And I shall quote the wisdom of Lester Wunderman and of course David Ogilvy and comment on the visual look of this email.
It doesn’t cost you any more to run good copy than bad, but I have seen disastrous losses transformed into huge profits just through changes in copy. In one case I saved a very large business from going broke with one ad.
Here is the video, which explains how and why the copy above is bad, and what should be done to improve it.
It is not all that complicated – but few things are. However, you really must understand these things if you want your business to succeed.
You can spare 15 minutes, can’t you? If what you see interests you, you can have your copy analysed by me – but only if you are quick.
It really depends on what you have on your mantelpiece.
What do I mean by that?
Watch the video – afterwards I’ll explain how you can save between £50 and £1050 …
[youtube GsfkiBUbfXM]
Would you like to:
- Have a dozen completely new ideas for copy to test.
- Use the power of “other people’s brains” to solve your copy problems.
- Unearth the deepest, most secretly-held objections that are preventing your best customers from doing business with you, and discover how to neutralize those objections.
- Understand your prospects better than they understand themselves.
- Have me analyse your copy – free.
I’m running a seminar called ‘Google AdWords and Beyond‘ with AdWords maestro Howie Jacobson on October 3rd at Southwark Cathedral.
I’m knocking £50 off the price and you can be there for only £247 (plus VAT).
But that’s not all …
If you’re one of the first 5 people to book their seat, I’ll analyse your copy for free – that’s an additional saving of at least £1000.
If all of this isn’t worth £247 I must be finally losing the plot.
So have a look here and book today before it sells out.
Hi Drayton – already signed up weeks ago – do I get £50 knocked off? May the force be with you (and us) – see you in October
Drayton, the name of the daily deals site is called LivingSocial and the company offering the deal through LivingSocial is Blue Mountain Training Solutions. In the video it sounded like you were thinking the daily deal site was Blue Mountain Training Solutions. In my opinion LivingSocial is a poor name for a daily deal site as well. I do agree the the copy in the ad is poorly written and trying to be cleaver or cutesy. I see they have sold 9 units. I wonder how many people saw the ad?
Where is the video link?
I thought the picture at the top was the link – but that is just a graphic image.
In the text you say “Here is the video” and “Watch the video” but there is no clickable link for a video, so I can’t watch the video. 🙁
The video should be fixed now, Carol. It’s about half way down the post.
I agree with everything you said, Drayton. It was lacklustre copy, off the point and not very compelling; highlighting factors that aren’t even the real selling points.
I think they are trying to be like AppSumo, who do playful copy very well with the ongoing meme of the dojo, sumo-lings (the punters) and the chief sumo. It’s no surprise they grew their list to over 500K in the space of a couple of years. If you want to see daily deal tech copy done well just subscribe to AppSumo’s mailing list!
I can’t find a working link to the video either. 🙁
Ask Gerald@draytonbird.com
Hi admin, still no video showing to watch, im viewing through an android mobile if that helps.
Cheers
david
The links still don’t seem to be active – is this perhaps because I’m on a mobile?
Keen to watch this video 🙂
Please ask Gerald@draytonbird.com. I knwo this is being sorted out.
Some great tips on writing copy. And loved that poem you shared, “Tell me quick and tell me true…”
What do you attribute the plethora of terrible marketing to? Is it from the widespread loss of basic selling skills?
Most advertising has always been pretty bad. But I think the decline in education is one cause for it being perhaps worse than ever. Another is the fact that people, never having been sufficiently encouraged to read at school, don’t study enough. I agree about selling skills.
I used to work for LivingSocial on Australia.
They have a very rigid guideline for their copy and this certainly doesn’t meet it from my memory. However someone internally probably thought it was clever as they are probably Star Wars fans themselves.
The group buying world is great for customer acquisition, but will only lead to discounting as you mention and unhappy merchants if they continue using the group buying sites
D
The phrase “Enjoy by January 13th” is typical of an increasing trend to overuse the word “enjoy” in marketing copy.
Copywriters seem to think that if they use the word “enjoy” consumers will mindlessly believe the product will bring pleasure, as in:-
“Buy one bottle of bleach and enjoy a second bottle at half price”