Why you’re reporting to Billy Marketing-Moron – and it’s making you ill. What can you do about it?

How in God’s name did he do better than you? Because although you don’t know it, he’s not in the same business as you. But don’t despair

You and I may never have met. I may not know where you work or what you do. But if you’re suffering under Billy Marketing-Moron (or his sister Wilhelmina) let me tell you why.

You see, the fact that you’re reading this tells me something. You want to succeed by being better at marketing. You want to know what works, what doesn’t and why. You want to apply your knowledge and measure the results.

And you think by doing so you will succeed.

But if you work for most big organisations, and many family-owned ones, odds are you’re on a hiding to nothing.

You see, Billy and his sister are on a different track to you. Their route to the top of the business is just that. How to get to the top of the business. They study the gentle art of brown-nosing, of how the company works, who to cultivate and how.

They spend their time in meetings so everyone knows who they are. They talk jargon no-one understands, but everyone lacks the guts to say so. They write incomprehensible documents full of charts.

They know all about corporate guidelines and what you shouldn’t do. They don’t give a hoot that they make no sense. They know they just have to toe the line to get ahead. They are excellent at acquiring titles. They don’t  study how to get paying customers and keep them, because their customers are not your customers.

You believe that the people who buy what you sell provide the money that pays your wages. They don’t care about that. To them the people who determine the wages are the ones who matter.

You care about the health of the business. They care about the health of their careers.

It’s driving you crazy. It will give you ulcers if you stay where you are.

Don’t despair. Stay the course. You are right in the long run. Knowledge is your best insurance policy.

You’re just in the wrong place.  Get out before Billy gives you ulcers.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

About the Author

In 2003, the Chartered Institute of Marketing named Drayton one of 50 living individuals who have shaped today’s marketing.

He has worked in 55 countries with many of the world’s greatest brands. These include American Express, Audi, Bentley, British Airways, Cisco, Columbia Business School, Deutsche Post, Ford, IBM, McKinsey, Mercedes, Microsoft, Nestle, Philips, Procter & Gamble, Toyota, Unilever, Visa and Volkswagen.

Drayton has helped sell everything from Airbus planes to Peppa Pig. His book, Commonsense Direct and Digital Marketing, out in 17 languages, has been the UK’s best seller on the subject every year since 1982. He has also run his own businesses in the U.K., Portugal and Malaysia.

He was a main board member of the Ogilvy Group, a founding member of the Superbrands Organisation, one of the first eight Honorary Fellows of the Institute of Direct Marketing and one of the first three people named to the Hall of Fame of the Direct Marketing Association of India. He has also been given Lifetime Achievement Awards by the Caples Organisation in New York and Early To Rise in Florida.

6 Comments

  1. Dave_C

    It’s easy to say,” leave”… even easy to to leave. And it’s also extremely difficult to find an organization that has anybody with a clue.

    After leaving such an org — not by choice — I wrote a snail mail letter to 24 sales and marketing directors, telling them i knew what worked in their industry. Not one reply… not even to check out my LI profile.

    Seems marketing people already know everything, having been taught by college profs who’ve never had to sell anything.

    1. Drayton

      I do admit it is extremely hard to find decent people to work for, which is why I ended up working for myself for the most part.

      1. I think working for yourself is the smartest thing you, or any halfway intelligent crustacean (thinking of myself here), can do. But it’s helpful to have a direction like you do – and you’ve worked so hard for yours! Speeches in Utrecht, Indian TV, people beating down your doors for advice, humor and wisdom! But how one gets to where you are is the kicker.

        1. Drayton

          I don’t actually think I work that hard, to be honest, Rose. But I think I work mostly on what matters.

      2. Create personas of your ideal ceinlt. Check on your current customers. Do you like your future customers to be like them? If yes, list down their characteristics.If not list down what exactly who you like to work with. Do you like to work with men? or women? Are they from Asia? or North America?The key here is to research and list down whatever you think your ideal ceinlt would be. Once you’re clear with it. You’ll have a better idea on how to connect with them and what products and services you can offer.

  2. Reminds me – in part – of my last job.

    One episode which stands out:

    They – finally – agreed to email all the customers about a new product.

    The ‘sales’ page on the website was shit – full of features and incomprehensible stuff the customers wouldn’t understand. But my colleagues did, how could the customers not?

    Still … at least they’d listened to me and there was a sales page.

    My all words, plain text email was rejected. The usual ‘it won’t work’ nonsense was peddled. So they want for the (idiot) General Manager’s image laden email instead.

    Testing my idea against theirs was – of course – totally out of the question.

    I’ve saved the … ahem … best for last.

    The email they opted for was a straight copy of the sales page. Anyone who clicked to find out more just got to see the same again. Only now it was in their browser, not their email client.

    I’m not sure my detractors ever understood why the response was big fat zero.

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