I see the Manchester police have launched a crackdown on alcohol-related violent crime. Yesterday as a prelude to my birthday my radiant companion and her sister planned to take me on a mini-pub crawl from Holland Park to chez nous …
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Yet another parliamentary jape
As all connoisseurs of bureaucratic filth know, the greatest source of public sector masturbation, corporate horseshit and all-round fuckwittery is the jobs section of The Guardian. Here dedicated reader and marketing maven Rezbi found the following announcement, clearly drafted by …
Read MoreA bit of cultural enlightenment for you
My friend Andy Owen, speaker, copywriter extraordinaire and good pal sent me this: “The budget should be balanced and the Treasury should be refilled. Public debt should be reduced and the arrogance of officialdom should be tempered and controlled. The …
Read MoreShame (and hypocrisy) all round
This morning in the Metro free paper there was a headline about a “Teacher’s Shame” with a picture of an attractive blonde. “Hello, hello,” I said to myself. “Some lucky young chap has had his dreams come true”. As we …
Read MoreA load of you-know-what goes round the S for Sugar bend
Pimlico Plumbers founder Charlie Mullins says the apprenticeship scheme fronted by Lord Sugar has wasted millions of pounds and left thousands of young people out of work. The programme has cost £2.85m, but of the 18,000 vacancies it has advertised, …
Read MoreScience Based Six Pack Review – Is It Scam Or Legit?
Science Based Six Packs is an unbelievable weight decrease program. It is gone for helping men and ladies shape their body in the state they had always wanted. Thomas Delauer, the creator of this amazing system has talked about vital …
Read MoreI think we can all relate to this, whatever our gender
A father walks into a restaurant with his young son. He gives the young boy 3 pound coins to play with to keep him occupied. Suddenly, the boy starts choking, going blue in the face. The father realizes the boy …
Read MorePinned down perfectly – the alternative being what?
This from The Sunday Times ANALYSE this: Gordon Brown has been studied by a psychological profiler who says his flawed personality, as someone who “lives totally in his head”, will cost Labour the next election. To make matters worse for …
Read MoreThank you, thank you, thank you
One of my colleagues remarked today that I was being provided a lot of material for this record of the random follies of mankind. But few greater gifts have been given lately than the news of the schoolboy who, out …
Read MoreThe Ministry of Sloth, Incompetence and Waste has just issued a new report
Yes, you’re right, I made it up after reading that there’s a Ministry for Business Innovation and Skills. That is beyond ludicrous. Could you even in your most demented dreams imagine a bunch of politicians and civil servants achieving anything …
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