Here is a quote from Rod Liddle, the leading bottle-thrower in The Spectator. “A charity called Help for Heroes, which raises money for wounded British soldiers, asked Portsmouth City Council for a £500 donation towards a proposed ‘fun day’. The …
Read MoreAuthor: Drayton
For male chauvinists and mathematicians only
I finished six pieces of copy yesterday and I’m fed up with sectarian squabbles, so time for a laugh.My friend Andy Owen just sent me a joke about these two ladies, which I have seen before, but it still made …
Read MoreNow, now, calm down you two
I see that my last two posts have started the internet version of a pub brawl. And I think I should say that the Mike in question is not my son-in-law, in case anyone thinks so. I have some sympathy …
Read MoreYou can always rely on Mike
My son-in-law Mike despite pretending to run a hotel outside Manchester only has one real interest in life: making dreadful jokes. He has not let me down: I got a message yesterday morning congratulating me on my Sunni disposition. Nice …
Read MoreOn jokes and such
My friend Rezbi got a bit excited about the last post, and my response is this. I like the joke. I also like Irish jokes, Jewish jokes, Polish jokes, English jokes, Scottish jokes (except for a few in Parliament), Australian …
Read MoreEngish Weather explained
A friend sent me this, and I just couldn’t resist it.In deference to The Archbishop of Canterbury and The Royal Commission for Political Correctness, it was announced today that the local climate should no longer be referred to as ‘English …
Read MoreGuess who has the most fun – and pays the price?
I don’t know whether I’ve said this before, but when I used to bang out six marketing columns a month someone asked me how I managed it. I said all I had to do was open any marketing publication anywhere …
Read MoreTechnology – doncha love it?
Recently my partner had a problem relating to national insurance. So she rang the appropriate number and received the following response from a pre-programmed clone. “You have done the right thing. You have called the right number. However, problems with …
Read MoreAt last, someone sees me for what I am
I don’t know what gremlin has wormed its way into my computer, but for the last two months I have suddenly started getting invitations to download porn again. For several years I had not received any – either the spam …
Read MoreApryl’s uncovenanted sex-change
I don’t know how many of you read the comments on these pieces, but what a surprise Apryl Parcher must have had when John Walters decided in his comment that she must be a man. Mind you, that’s understandable; A.Parcher …
Read More